Many of us who grew up in unpredictable families developed a kind of hyper-vigilance, a need to always be “on” and be on the lookout for the next crisis, drama, or disappointment to manage. So if we yearn for it, then why don’t we go for it? The simple answer is habit. Mahatma Gandhi said, “Our life is a long arduous quest after Truth.” It is our yearning to find peace, relaxation, and quietness so that we may experience the true nature of our being. The true impetus for all this feverish striving is actually the impatient call of our soul. In our desperate race to be accepted for what we do rather than who we are, we believe the more we get done and the more we accomplish means the more we’ll be loved. Our accomplishments and productivity have become synonymous with our worth in today’s world. So why do we keep running like this? Because it is terrifying to let go of our busyness. Ironically, it’s the last place we tend to look. We can’t find peace in fancy holidays, home security alarms, or credit cards as the media promises. Yet if we develop a simple practice of turning within and being still, we can find ‘the kingdom of heaven within us’. It’s true at first, when we tune into ourselves, we may encounter the grief and ache of our hearts that have been used, bruised or broken.

The result? We keep on moving further away from ourselves, until it seems as if we start living next door to who we really are. This desperate pursuit is actually masking our fear of emptiness and loneliness. This speed and activity deafens us to the call of our soul and, sadly, we have mistaken this restlessness as the need for materiality rather than the need for spirituality. Without that stillness, our lives remain infected with a chronic busyness that keeps us going, doing, and running. Our craving for peace and relaxation is evident in the many spas and yoga centers springing up everywhere, but we can only find the peace and relaxation we seek within the stillness of our own minds. The thought of not talking, sitting still, and listening to the silence feels unnerving and seems purposeless to many. We all want relaxation and peace, but the fact is we can’t stand it! Stillness and silence, which are the means of finding inner peace, are often far too scary.

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